All My Eggs

Okay, so we have all heard the phrases:
"Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
"Six to one.  Half dozen to the other."

I don't know where they came from and honestly that's not the point.  The point is that in this moment I am wishing I had paid attention to their wisdom.

I thought I was being patient.
I thought I wasn't putting all my eggs in one basket.
I thought I was following where I was being called.
There is still a chance these are true, but the last couple of days my spirits have been low because I am doubting these thoughts.

For the past four months I have been working through the process of application to a mission agency.  About a month ago I was given the impression that I was accepted and so I have begun to prepare myself and those around me for this major life change.  About a week ago I spent a large amount of my own money as an investment into the final step of the process of my decision to accept the call or not. (i.e. a plane ticket to meet the team and get to know the community)

In the days following that expenditure I was given information that indicated I am NOT officially accepted yet.  The emotions that followed were a roller coaster in range.  I am now more than a little uncertain about the agency and how it works.  I am asking that you help me in the coming weeks by praying through the following:

-communication to be clarified
-discernment on how to proceed if they do finalize the acceptance
-that I will not be depressed or downtrodden because of the cost if I am not accepted
-to be reminded God has always provided and will continue to provide for me no matter the situation
-for the situation to resolve in a way that is beneficial for all parties involved
-that I will recognize no matter where I put my "eggs" God is the one that holds all the baskets so it WILL be how he wants it to be, even if it's not how I expected

After council from my mentors as well as the outreach pastor from my church I am encouraged that no matter the outcome and/or my decision I will be supported.  This will not be an easy decision, but I pray God will open my eyes to see the path he is illuminating for me.

Thank you for following along with me on this journey.